You Don't Have To Do This
by spottedhorse
Summary: Jack is lost but then he finds his way.


This is my first attempt at Without A Trace. I never even watched it until they did the crossover with CSI and then I was hooked. In some ways Jack Malone is a simple character and in some ways, very complex. I hope this little snippet catches at least a part of that. It centers on the scene at the end of the season where Jack visits Sam at the hospital.

Jack Malone stood in the hallway outside his office feeling lost, the inevitable tide of the last few weeks finally settling over him, the waves of events receding and leaving him floundering, like a grounded fish on the beach. Intuitively he knew it was coming because he had let it, not fighting the forces that were working to uproot him from his position. In a way, he felt relief. It was a battle he would no longer have to wage. But the job had been his anchor through so much; without it he was left adrift. Maria and the girls were so far away, Anne was gone, and Samantha…well, he'd pretty well sunk that ship. He thought.

As he thought of the beautiful blonde, he couldn't remember having seen her around in the last few hours. Instinctively he headed for her desk, where he found a rookie sitting at her post. It didn't take much effort to put the pieces together and he headed for the hospital. He found her in her room holding her new son. His heart sat in his throat as he stood watching her gaze at the baby, the baby that he desperately wished was his. And suddenly, he wasn't feeling so lost. Suddenly, he knew exactly where he needed to be…wanted to be.

Jack slipped into the room and peeked at the baby. She even let him hold the little guy. He had almost forgotten what it was like, holding new life, but it came back easily. The baby was soft, and warm, full of that little baby smell and Jack felt whole again…well almost.

He sat watching her hold the boy and peace settled over him, peace that eluded him for so many years, forever. Not knowing quite how to express his feelings, he gave them simple words, although words from Jack were seldom simple. "You don't have to do this alone, you know."

She looked at him, her expression betraying the anger that still sat below the surface. He'd torpedoed any chance of her son having a father and she had been furious. He sent her such conflicting signals all the time. They had been in a relationship but then he called it off, but then he kept circling her, watching. Each had been hurt and there for the other but then backing away again. He'd had something with Anne and she'd had something less with Brian. And now she had a son; a son who she wished could claim Jack Malone as his father. And now he says she didn't have to do it alone. Confusion ripped through her; what did he mean?

Jack saw the confusion in her look and knew she didn't understand. In all the times that he had known her, this was one of the few times she hadn't understood. It was as if they had this silent communication going on and she could read his mind. But this time he needed to clarify. "Anymore, I mean," he told her.

He watched as she absorbed his meaning, understood his intent. An eyebrow lifted and a small frown creased her forehead. "But…our jobs."

"The rules pertain to a supervisor and a subordinate, not co-workers."

"But?"

"I lost my job; getting kicked back down," he said flatly.

Her frown deepened. "I'm sorry."

Jack tilted his head, glanced at the baby and then gazed at her. "I don't think I am," he mumbled.

Samantha's eyes widened. A knowing look came over her as she stared into his dark eyes. And then a small smile began to creep across her face.

As Jack watched her expression change, he knew. The baby might not have his DNA, but he would raise it as his own. And he would do everything he could for the rest of his life to make up for all the pain he'd caused Sam, his Sam. He leaned up and put his hand on hers. "You don't have to do this alone, you know," he said again.

She smiled. "Yeah," she answered simply. "I know."

So, did I do a decent job? Was I even close? Please review and tell me what you think.


End file.
